If there’s one thing I’ve learned since quitting drinking, it’s that beliefs can become self-fulfilling prophecies.
If you believe that alcohol is the only path to pleasure, then you’re bound to become hooked on alcohol again eventually.
Why? Because human beings can’t survive without pleasure. The pleasure-pain mechanism embedded in each of us is many millions of years older than our rational minds.
On the other hand, if you believe (correctly) that alcohol is a body-poisoning substance that robs tomorrow’s feel-good brain chemicals in exchange for 10 minutes of bliss today, then you’re far less likely to waste your life missing alcohol.
There’s no better feeling in the world than liberation from something that once tortured you.
That’s not to say that you should feel ashamed for missing alcohol in early recovery. This is totally normal, and it takes some time to rewire your brain away from alcohol addiction.
I’m just here to tell you that there’s light at the end of the tunnel, provided you do two very important things:
- Take control of your biochemistry
- Take control of your psychology
Eliminate any and all limiting beliefs about why you think you need alcohol in your life.
Don’t become one of those people who never stops talking about how being a nondrinker is such a struggle.
Millions of nondrinkers don’t think it’s a struggle.
Assuming you take care of your body-brain system, being a nondrinker is only a struggle if you allow yourself to harbor alcohol-worshipping thoughts.
In the video below, I describe how I started taking control of my psychology after quitting drinking.
(Click here to watch the video on YouTube)
Poison Doesn’t Deserve Second-Guessing
In my online course, Total Alcohol Recovery 2.0, one of the first sections is entitled: Transcending The Cult Of Silent Destruction.
I really believe that our culture’s obsession with heavy drinking is a cult of silent destruction. No one is at fault directly, but when a culture revolves in large part around the consumption of a toxin, something isn’t quite right.
I can’t tell you how many emails I’ve gotten from “secret alcoholics” and “borderline alcoholics” who don’t fit the typical molds of problem drinkers, but who nonetheless have escalating problems with heavy drinking and withdrawal.
Alcohol is an inherently addictive poison, and vast swaths of the population are biochemically susceptible to becoming dependent on it.
With that said, I’m far from a prohibitionist.
I don’t judge anyone who drinks, or who uses anything to enhance their experience of life. Nearly all of my family and friends drink, and I make fun of them when they’re hung over.
As far as mind-alteration goes, I believe that there are much better options out there. Kava, kratom, coffee, yoga, and intense exercise are among my preferred forms – they never make me feel worse for wear.
If you want to transcend the heavy drinking lifestyle and start building an exciting and FULL life, you can devise your plan with the help of my online course, Total Alcohol Recovery 2.0.
I hope you enjoyed this article and video! Be sure to subscribe to the Fit Recovery channel on YouTube.
Hi Chris,
My name is David and I’m from Cape Town South Africa. I have been drinking for just over 10 years and know deep down I need to stop.
Came across your profile with a Google search and have been following the material you put out there.
My problem is the beer – copious amounts every night. Embarrassed to say how many in case people gasp at the possible health implications.
I’m 39 and I think I’m struggling with the idea that life is really that much better without the false high of alcohol. It’s not something I felt I could ever say in some of the AA meetings I’ve been to.
I possibly see the difference of life with alcohol and life without it, and I feel I’m not sure it really is much better without it.
At the moment while I’m still in the ‘fog’ of it, I imagine I haven’t thought clearly for a very long time. Yet, with the best of my sporting youth gone – which was at the time exhilarating and fun – I do wonder what’s left.
The time drags on weekends, especially the evenings. The games on televsion to watch no longer spark me as they used to. I can’t stand the idea of wasting five hours walking after a golf ball say.
It’s such a huge thing to leave behind is the drink – it’s leaving behind a way of life that while in parts was miserable and had very bad side affects, in others it was exciting and new – in some ways, the gift that keeps on giving (negatively and positively).
I’m not even sure what it is I’m trying to ask or say – perhaps you could write me a few lines that could give me more understanding of where I’m at, and how change could be better.
Many thanks and kind regards,
David Minchella
Hi David, fantastic comment! I put off quitting drinking for years because I thought life without alcohol was not worth living.
I was wrong.
In fact, I wouldn’t have been able to build this site if I had not been wrong.
A full explanation of why life is better without alcohol would take a book, and you can find something like that in my eBook, Drinking Sucks!
You say some very interesting things that I would have once said. You’re aware that you’re still “in the fog of it” – as it is, alcohol has hijacked your brain and every single feel-good chemical within it. These chains can be broken by means of supplementation, exercise, and the power of your own focus – a full immersion into all these solutions combined together, not isolated or half-assed, for best results.
“The time drags on weekends” – once again, you currently view life through the lens of your physical addiction to alcohol. Break it once and for all and see how much vaster the universe is than games on television.
Get out of your comfort zone and envision new things. You only live once. Anything is more objectively exciting than relying on a can of something to make boring things seem interesting.
PS – The best of your sporting youth need not be gone! I know guys who work out intensely and play sports into their 80s and 90s. Change your biochemistry, change your thoughts, change your social circles – fire up your imagination – and change your life.
I do not mean to sound condescending here. If I could go back in time and tell myself these things, I would have saved myself from years of borderline nihilism.
Dave, (and Chris)
I can attest to the subject content of Chris’ book being extremely helpful, however I can also relate. I have had a 5 day migraine, something that never happened whilst drinking, along with some other virus attacks that just never happened until the drinking stopped, and I think it is clearly a result of actually thinking with my brain instead of just being under the influence on a daily basis. Whatever the reason, clearly not worth the trade off of consuming alcohol! June 5 was an important 30 day mark for me, and I’m not giving up!!
Like Chris mentions, I get a whole lot more done than before, and I have started becoming my former self which I rather like much better, I should add. The key to success is find something to replace the alcohol with. Exercise is a great example, because once you start appreciating the way you look, you will not want to sacrifice that for drinking again because we cannot successfully do both. One thing that helps me when I miss my routine of after work drinks is to just tell myself, “I can do that at any time I want to, I’ll do it later. Right now I want to ________________.” Then I get busy and never get around to drinking. That works so much better than thinking I can’t drink anymore etc. It’s like dieting, when you tell yourself you cannot eat cookies, you want about 40 cookies!!
You can do this. If Chris can, we can. That is my mindset (really for all of life).
Good luck.
Jess
Fantastic comment. Thanks for being an inspiration Jess!
I’m so glad I ran across this by accident. I think it was meant for me right now though! I could identify with everything you said about missing alcohol! Will definitely be reading your ebook!! Thank you Chris!
Thank you Joanne! My eBook page was down yesterday but it’s back today, hope you enjoy it!